Dear Wild Advice, My bpyfriend and i have been going out for about 6 months and we've been having sex for about 5. The sex is good, dont get me wrong. He is great in bed considering we both lost our virginity to each other. He pleases me all the time and even after the issues he had about eating me out, he got over them and did it this weekend. But i feel like dont pleasure him enough, or long enough. He knows I'm open to any possibilities that he may suggest, but he doesnt do that. So I do whatever I feel he may like, which are playing with his ears, hand-jobs, bj's, and playing with his chest area. But when i consider how long he does things as opposed to how long I do, it seems like a big difference. I dont perticuarly like giving bj's, but i do it because he likes it, and because i don't, I normally just do it for a little while as foreplay, never actually making him ejaculate. I want to make him happy, and I think I am, but I just wish that I could please him more. The other thing is that i dont think hes as comfortable talking about sex as i am, i think he feels odd talking freely about it. i can talk openly to him, but whenever i bring it up, he just gives me a short quick answer to change the subject. Is there any way to make him be more open about it or any suggestion on how i can make myself please him more? Thank you Dear Miss WantMore, First off, someone has to start the discussions about sex, those don't usually happen between couples very easily. You're willing to talk about it, that's good. As long as he does get involved, reluctantly or not, you're still ahead of the game. But there is a non verbal way to communicate your desires too. I got this idea from my Kinky Friends. Hey, I give credit where credit's due. Anyway, write your desire out on an index card and leave it for him to find. Of course, leave it somewhere in which only he will find it. You don't want it in the wrong person's hands. Make your desire as sweet as you want or as graphic. Tell him how you feel about wanting to try new things and tell him this is a great way to do it without actually talking about. Although, my main view is, if you can do it, you should be able to talk about it, but that's another conversation entirely. Tell him you'd love to know what he would like too. That may open some doors for you. There's also Glow in the Dark Erotic Dice. You just roll the dice perform the action the one die says on the body part the other die says. Cheap, fun, easy and you can put them in your purse and use them any time. There's also Lovers Lotto which is like a scratch off lotto card, but has sexy actions on them. Give him one of those to make things spark. The important thing is not to put a lot of pressure on yourself to have this ultimately amazing sex life with this guy. Be confident in what you are doing and just have fun playing and being with him. So many couples take sex so seriously and yes it is serious to a relationship when it happens and safe sex should be taken very seriously, but once involved in the act it should be fun. There are no rules or time length on foreplay, intercourse, orgasm. Just do what feels good and enjoy being with the other person.

Dear Wild Advice, I like to perform oral sex on my boyfriend. I feel pretty comfortable doing it, but I still can't deep throat him. How do I get around that gag reflex? Also, when I'm performing, what's the best way to give him a hand job and suck at the same time? Thanks. Dear Gag Queen, Use your hand. Stroke him with one hand and follow that hand with taking him in your mouth. That will give the feeling of deep throating without actually doing it. Another thing... practice, practice, practice.

Dear Wild Advice, First of all, I highly recommend a hot tub for those looking to re-kindle the love. The best money I have ever spent. But I wonder if I need to be concerned about the chemicals and is it possible it will iratate her? Also, any advice on how I can provide the oral service? I was thinking about snorkle's or goggles for this. Dear Tub Licker, Water play can be irritating to a woman; pool, tub, hot tub; because water flushes out and washes away all natural lubricant. It's fun to play in the water, but just not for a long period of time. Water can actually be very drying to the vagina. As for oral in the hot tub? Why don't you have her sit on the edge of the tub and give her oral that way? Try the goggles, but I'll bet your head's going to cook in that water and you won't be chowing down too long.

Dear Wild Advice, When my penis is erect, it curves to the right. I used to wear briefs and everytime I had an erection, it would press up against the underwear all the time, so maybe that's what caused it. Also, I've read that maybe I've got some damaged skin in the penis where it curves. I'm 18, still a virgin and I'm concerned how I'll have intercourse with a girl. I dont think it's even possible. Are there any products out on the market, like a cream or something, that straightens out the penis? Maybe something like a tunnel thing (kinda like the cardboard of the toilet paper) but longer to put the penis in and maybe train the penis after a few weeks to make it straight. (just a thought). I really need a way besides surgery to straighten it out. Any help will be appreciated. Dear Right Turn, There's nothing wrong with the fact that your penis curves to the right. Just like all vaginas are different, all penises are different too. Some curve to the left, some curve to the right, but that doesn't mean that sex is impossible. You can have sex like a normal person, it won't give you trouble. According to a survey by the Kinsey Institute, 20% of men said their penis pointed straight out. So that means that the other 80% curved, tilted or pointed in some other direction. ONLY 20% have straight penises! That's not a lot of men. The only time you should be concerned is if you experience pain during sex because of the shape. And if you do, contact your doctor to get checked out. Pain in the penis is nothing to fool around with. Yikes.

Dear Wild Advice, My boyfriend wants me to give him oral sex, but i don't know if I can because he has genital warts and I'm scared that I'll get them if I go down on him. I want to please him, so what I want to know is if I give him oral sex will i get genital warts? If the answer is yes, is there any another way to go about sucking him off? Thanks. Dear Worry Wart, The only way I could imagine getting around this problem is to make him wear a condom while you perform oral. However, that defeats the purpose and honestly isn't very enjoyable. I'm at a loss for words. That sucks! Literally.

Dear Wild Advice, Sometimes my girlfriend plays with my back and pops a few pimples, but the pain of it makes me feel like cumming...have you heard of this? Is it normal? Dear Erotic Bacne, This may not be the most common act of pleasure, but it's not too crazy. You may be the type of person who enjoys pain and gets off on it. Have another slice of pizza and enjoy the zit poppin' pleasure.

Dear Wild Advice, I recently found out that my girlfriend doesn't shave her pubic region at all, except for her bikini line. I personally think a lot of hair down there is disgusting. How can I ask her without asking or how can I bring it up without being too obvious. I don't want to offend her at all but its sort of a turnoff. The option of just coming out and telling her how i feel about it is out so i need some other advice. Dear Bush Wacked, Well, have you put yourself in her shoes? How would you feel if your girlfriend told you she was disgusted by your pubic hair. Would you be upset? When it comes to this kind of situation, only you know what your significant other can hear without getting completely hurt. What if she didn't shave, but groomed it better? Would that help? Either way, something's gotta give. Either you accept her for the way she is or you start to inquire on whether or not she's interested in shaving. You could try to get bath or shower play going and see what happens. You have her shave your pubic hair first and then you shave hers. There really is no easy way to go about it. You can try the you shave me, now I'll shave you thing and see if that works. Make it a playful thing and she may go for it. But you also have to be prepared for some hurt feelings.

Dear Wild Advice, My boyfriend has gone down on me, but I've never gone down on him and I'd really like to return the favour. I've never done it before and quite frankly I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. Dear Poor Play, Well first off, relax. Second, "NO Teeth". Keep in mind that his body language should tell you if he likes a certain thing you're doing. There's no 'wrong' way to do it. Or you could just simply ask if he likes it like that. Basically you just have to lick and suck. It may also help to put in some hand movements.

Dear Wild Advice, Recently my boyfriend told me that I have an extremly unpleasent smelling vagina, unlike all the other girls he's been with. I'm not really sure what to make of this, other than to be utterly horrified. Is this normal? Could it be something I'm eating or not eating? How can I fix this? Please help me so I don't end up self concious and obsessively washing myself. Dear Odor Eater, What you eat does have an affect on the way you taste and/or smell. Alcohol, garlic, saturated fats, soy sauce and spicy foods give your secretions a bitter taste and/or smell. Less spicy foods give you a more neutral taste and/or smell and sugary foods have been known to leave a sweet memory on the tongue. All women have some kind of odor and it's more around puberty and at the time of your period. Do you sweat a lot? Constant sweating and moisture down there will not help you smell any better.

Dear Wild, My boyfriend and I have been having phone sex for a while...well, sort of. Just telling each other dreams and fantasies and what you would do if you were togther right now type of thing. Is there anything else that is recommended to enhance the experience? Dear Phone Lover, Why not have one of you lie back and listen, while the other tells either a fantasy or tells the other what to do, usually guiding you to masterbate. Then swap over. Another good one is if you both have internet, get MSN Instant Messaging, and have a story sex on there. It's easier than phone sex, because you can take a bit more time to think of replies, and you don't sound so stupid

Dear Wild KC, Can you tell if a man has recently had sex, like that same day or night before? For instance it always seems to me when its been several days since my husband and I have had sex his balls feel full and they are tight etc etc. But when they feel all limp like or mooshy it seems like we just recently had sex or He has been MIA with no explanation. But are there any ways to really tell? Turn & Cough Dear Turn & Cough, Determining whether a man has recently had sex by the tightness of his nads is as accurate as determining a man's erection size by the size of his flaccid penis. In other words, it ain't! The scrotum (sack) and it's contents (testicles, ect) are a thermostatically controlled heat maintenance system designed to keep sperm as close to optimal temperature, about 93 degrees, as possible. The scrotum does this by shrinking when cold, thus bringing the whole works closer to the body's warmth, and loosening when hot, moving those precious (or evil depending on the goal of your coupling) sperm to a cooler area. This is why when you ask your man, "What are you thinking about?", he responds with that 'deer caught in the headlights of life' stare. He's concentrating on maintaining that optimal temperature. Just kidding. The whole process is automatic. He's probably just debating that next video game system he's going to buy or what could be on that 163'rd channel he was just flipping to when you stopped the "remote clicking madness". So no. Unless he smells like skank and is ripe with crabs (and you don't and aren't) then there is no sure way to tell if your man has been sleeping around. But, here's a novel idea; ask him. Of course there's also the possibility you're sensing he recently whacked off. Does this mean he doesn't desire you? No. All men; married, dating, single, in prison with a boyfriend named Butch, .... ALL MEN MASTURBATE. It has very little to do with their sexual relationship with you or anything you're not doing.